Why You Don’t Have to “Be Strong” During Pregnancy
Many women feel an enormous amount of pressure to be strong during pregnancy.
To cope quietly.
To stay positive.
To be grateful and get on with it.
But pregnancy is one of the biggest physical, emotional, and identity transitions a person can experience. Expecting yourself to handle it without support, (both socially and medically) doesn’t make you strong. It makes things harder than they need to be.
Feeling overwhelmed during pregnancy doesn’t mean you’re failing.
It means you’re human.
Where the Pressure to “Be Strong” Comes From
Pregnancy is often portrayed as a time of joy and excitement. While those feelings can absolutely exist, they’re not the full picture for many women.
Pregnancy can also bring:
Anxiety about the unknown
Fear linked to past loss or trauma
Physical exhaustion and hormonal changes
Shifts in identity and relationships
Emotional vulnerability
When these experiences don’t match the image of what pregnancy should look like, many women turn the pressure inward. They tell themselves they should cope better, complain less, or feel differently.
This pressure often leads to silence and silence can be isolating.
Strength Isn’t Coping Alone
Real strength doesn’t mean pushing everything down or pretending you’re okay when you’re not.
Sometimes strength looks like:
Saying “I’m struggling”
Asking for help before things feel unbearable
Letting yourself rest without guilt
Talking about fears you’ve been carrying quietly
Allowing yourself to be supported
Pregnancy support counselling offers a space where you don’t have to perform, explain, or minimise what you’re feeling.
What Real Support Actually Looks Like
Real support isn’t about fixing you or telling you how you should feel.
It looks like:
Being listened to without judgement
Feeling safe enough to speak honestly
Having your emotions taken seriously
Understanding how your body and nervous system respond to stress
Learning gentle ways to care for yourself emotionally
In counselling, we might talk through anxiety, fears about birth, relationship stress, or emotional triggers that have been stirred up during pregnancy. Sometimes the support is simply having a place where you don’t have to hold it together.
Trauma-Informed Support Matters
For women who have experienced miscarriage, fertility challenges, or birth trauma, pregnancy can bring old fears back to the surface.
Trauma-informed support recognises this and moves at your pace. It may include grounding techniques, somatic (body-based) support, EFT tapping, or EMDR therapy - always with your consent and comfort at the centre.
You don’t have to relive past experiences to receive support. Healing can be gentle.
You’re Allowed to Need Support
Pregnancy already asks so much of you.
You don’t need to prove your strength by coping alone.
You don’t need to wait until things feel unbearable.
And you don’t need to justify why you’re struggling.
Support is allowed and it can make this season feel steadier, calmer, and more manageable. It sets you and your family up for the best possible future.
Support Is Available
If pregnancy feels harder than you expected, you don’t have to navigate it alone.
I offer perinatal counselling in Tamworth NSW and telehealth support Australia-wide, providing gentle, trauma-informed support during pregnancy and early parenthood.
When you’re ready, I’m here.
