Grief Isn’t About Letting Go - It’s About Learning to Hold On Differently
When someone we love is no longer here, their physical presence may be gone, but the bond doesn’t disappear. The love, the memories, the connection - they remain. Grief is the expression of that love, not a failure to move forward. Love and loss go hand in hand.
Grief Doesn’t Have an Expiry Date
For those who haven’t experienced deep loss, grief can be misunderstood.
There’s often an unspoken expectation that, over time, we should “move on,” feel better, or return to who we were before. But grief doesn’t work like that.
It doesn’t follow a neat timeline.
It doesn’t arrive in predictable stages.
And it doesn’t disappear just because time passes.
Grief changes shape, but it doesn’t end.
Holding On in New Ways - Continuing the Bond
Decorating a gravesite.
Holding onto favourite belongings.
Saying their name out loud.
Thinking about them on ordinary days.
These acts aren’t signs of being stuck. They’re signs of continuing connection.
Grief isn’t about forgetting. It’s about integrating love into life as it is now. It’s about finding ways to carry what matters forward, even when the world expects you to move faster than your heart can manage.
When Grief Feels Lonely
One of the hardest parts of grief is how isolating it can feel.
Your partner may be grieving differently to you. Others may not know what to say. Some may avoid the topic altogether. Others may offer reassurance that unintentionally minimises the depth of your experience.
This can leave you feeling alone in your grief as though you have to carry it quietly to make others comfortable.
But grief deserves space.
And so do you.
Grief Is the Price of Love
Grief exists because love existed first.
It’s not a weakness.
It’s not something to fix.
And it’s not something to rush.
Grief reshapes us, yes, but it also connects us. It keeps relationships alive in new forms. It reminds us of what mattered and still matters.
Love doesn’t end when someone is gone.
It changes - but it remains.
If You’re Grieving Right Now
If you’re carrying grief, whether from pregnancy loss, birth-related experiences, or another significant loss, please know this:
You don’t need to justify your grief.
You don’t need to compare it to anyone else’s.
And you don’t need to meet anyone else’s timeline.
You’re allowed to take your time.
You’re allowed to speak their name.
You’re allowed to remember.
Support Is Available
Grief can feel heavy to carry alone.
If you’re navigating loss and would like a safe, compassionate space to talk, support is available. Counselling offers a place where your grief can be acknowledged without pressure to “move on” or explain yourself.
I offer perinatal counselling in Tamworth NSW and telehealth support Australia-wide, including support for pregnancy loss and grief.
When you’re ready, I’m here.
